Fifteen days. Bernie, the gum-chewing web developer, is still going strong, though his gum—his once-mighty, minty companion—is clearly struggling. It stretches too much, clings to his teeth a little too eagerly, and seems to be defying the laws of elasticity. Yet, against all odds, he chews on.
The coffee shop crowd is as invested as ever, but today, the real headline wasn’t just the gum—it was Bernie’s wardrobe. He walked in wearing a shirt without a single hole in it, which, for those who know Bernie, is nothing short of a miracle. Lauren nearly dropped her can of Liquid Death in shock. “Bernie! Did you—did you get a new shirt?”
Bernie looked down at himself, as if only now realizing the significance of his attire. “Oh. Yeah, I guess so. Laundry day.”
The room collectively nodded in silent respect. A fresh shirt. A worn-out gum. The paradox of Bernie deepened.
But not everyone is on board with the ongoing gum saga. Susan, the coffee shop manager, has finally had enough. With her arms crossed and a tired expression, she pulled Sweet Sweet Rosie aside, her patience clearly wearing as thin as the gum itself.
“Rosie,” she said in a hushed but urgent tone. “What exactly is going on here? Why is this man still chewing the same piece of gum? Why are people acting like it’s some sort of epic tale?”
Rosie, ever the diplomatic talking dog, wagged her tail and gave Susan an understanding nod. “It’s about resilience, Susan. It’s about determination. It’s about seeing something through to the bitter, rubbery end.”
Susan sighed. “It’s about a guy chewing gum for too long.”
“That too,” Rosie admitted. “But also, destiny.”
Susan pinched the bridge of her nose. “Rosie, I just need to know—is this ever going to stop?”
Rosie tilted her head, deep in thought. “That depends on the gum.”
Susan groaned and walked away, muttering about how she never signed up to manage a coffee shop that doubles as a reality show. But no matter how exasperated she is, the truth remains: Bernie is still chewing, the people are still watching, and the legend continues.
How much longer can the gum last? And, perhaps more importantly, how much longer can Susan tolerate this nonsense? We’ll find out soon enough.
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